Too Long; Didn't Read
A long, long time ago (depending on your historical outlook), in a stock market far, far away (depending on where you're currently reading this), risk-seeking Dutchmen congregated in coffee shops (something like that) to trade little pieces of paper, which, in theory, allowed them to reap the profits of voyages to unknown lands where new commodities would be discovered (like sugar and stuff like that). These little pieces of paper would come to be known as stocks (aka stonks).