As you begin a new job, where do you put your focus: building relationships or delivering results? The question itself creates a false dichotomy. Relationships and results are not mutually exclusive. Many of the best-performing companies and teams deliver exceptional results because of relationships. Of course, good relationships go by other names in the corporate world: strong culture, high-performance teams, and high-trust work environments.
Shift to People First
In the first years of your career, it’s appropriate to focus on results. It’s also a natural transition from academics, where your grade is determined based on the results you deliver via homework, tests, and projects.
Alperstein recognized her bias towards execution-driven results and made a deliberate shift. She explains, “Earlier in my executive career, I was too in the weeds, too detailed in terms of execution for a strategic leader. I was overly oriented towards accountability and results. It's not that I didn't care about people. I did, but I wasn't necessarily people-first. I was more focused on results first and people second.”
A turning point for Alperstein was when her team gave her feedback that her communication style around accountability could come across as too direct or even abrasive. She took the feedback seriously. “I adjusted my approach a little bit with the group to focus more on their needs and the relationships, and we still achieved our goals. And it was a much more enjoyable experience for all of us. Then I went to the next job, and I applied this approach of being in service of and supportive to the people on my team as my primary objective, and that allowed me to quickly build trust, relationships, and appreciation from them - which set us up to achieve results together from the start.”
It’s Not a Tradeoff
Alperstein learned that you can deliver great results while putting relationships first. That’s a balance many people don’t believe. Elon Musk famously says you can’t have both empathy and results. That mentality sets up a tradeoff that’s widely accepted as truth.
Alperstein is unwilling to accept that such a trade-off exists. She believes in prioritizing people, but at the same time, she’s not willing to accept a lower performance standard. In her words, “You can't just have good relationships and not do a good job. You have to be able to do those things in concert with one another.”
Misunderstanding Empathy
Doing both in concert – being a people-first leader focused on results – requires a shift in perspective. It’s not “one or the other”, and it’s not “one at a time”. Leaders unlock real value when they learn to be people first while holding others accountable.
“It doesn't mean you're a pushover and don't hold people accountable for their work. You just do it in a more empathetic way,” Alperstein explains. Doing both at the same time is what leads to exceptional business results.
The Dividends of a High Trust Culture
Business results are the product of people’s work, and to deliver exceptional results requires effective communication and coordination among teams. Trust and relationships are the foundation for high-quality communication.
“When you have developed a relationship with people, you can be honest and direct with them when they are not meeting expectations in some particular way,” Alperstein says. In fact,
As Alperstein explains, “If you don't have trust and you haven't built a strong relationship, then constructive feedback can be perceived as creating a toxic environment.”
How to Excel as a Leader
Constructive feedback down the organization is important, but communication is equally important going up the organization. When communication flows easily, the leader provides clear direction and priorities to the team, and the team communicates status, obstacles, and requests to the leader. Once again, trust is an essential element that is multi-directional.
Reflecting on her style as a leader, Alperstein credits her “ability to create trust with people on my team and empower them so they can do incredible work. Being able to unlock their ability to deliver value and grow in their careers is what leadership is about. A strong team is going to come up with things that are beyond your wildest dreams. A lot of that performance is rooted in relationship and mutual trust.”
A Barrier to Execution
What about companies that aren’t delivering? When facing execution challenges, leadership often blames the team and considers layoffs, reorgs, or other personnel changes. While there may be genuine delivery issues, Alperstein recognizes – like
“I see some companies zigzagging all over the place, trying to chase the market and not stick with a strategy. And when their Product team doesn’t deliver anything meaningful, the executives wonder why and blame the Product team when it's really an issue of an executive team that can't stay focused. And this leads to serious trust issues - the employees don’t trust their leaders, and the leaders don’t trust their team. It’s very difficult to execute in an environment like that.”
Getting more efficient
A high-trust environment supports solving the execution issue.
“You have to be able to receive information from your team and help them figure out how to get more efficient. They often know what the problems are, and even how to solve them; however, they might not think they have the authority to do so. Having an open and honest two-way dialogue will help ensure you can unblock the challenges that the team is struggling with.”
“I'm a big believer in learning at all levels and feedback from all directions. Not just top down, but bottom up in order to make better decisions.” That requires trust.
A Strong Culture
Culture is not what’s written on the wall. It is a description of the repeated behaviors and values of a workgroup. If you want a high-performance culture, follow Alperstein’s model of building a people-first organization, emphasizing trust and relationships. They are the foundation of teamwork, communication, feedback, learning, and ultimately performance.